The Boy and The Coconut Tree

Merry Christmas/Happy Holidays/Happy Hannukkah and hoping that 2015 is a super fantastic year  for all of you!  And here is a Christmas episode of Modern Family, Enjoy!

Today is referred to as " panic Saturday " the last Saturday before Christmas when people do there last minute shopping for gifts and for things that will probably end up in the bin by next Saturday.  The British shopper is keeping the UK economy afloat but I wonder how much of that money is spent on credit cards and on UK made things. We are probably doing more to help the Banks and the Chinese than we are our own country!? I am avoiding the shopping areas of London today and for the next 2 weeks, I don't want to be trampled to death by crazy idiots wanting a reduced wide-screen television in John Lewis. I did the last of my shopping yesterday, I managed to spend £130 in less than 2 hours, a record for me but I used to be a shopaholic and had a lot of pent up buying to do. I found out yesterday that I was going to be in work in January and reasonably paid as well, my salary in January will be 62% higher than it was in November, a huge leap and I had almost given up hop...

It is almost time to say goodbye to 2014 and looking back it won't be a year I will remember well, it certainly had good times in it, I will remember the good times in Barcelona will fondness and my trip to Sicily was great but the bad things about the year will hopefully fade away into nothing. I lost an uncle in August to cancer, not an uncle I was close to but as he was my Dad's older brother it had an impact on us all and when my Dad is down and sad, we feel it. It was hopefully the year that I learnt that dating people more than 10 years younger than me is a mistake, I fell headlong into a short but interesting relationship with 29 year old (Jose) who claimed we had communication problems, he dumped me on Facebook so taking lessons in communication from that idiot is not something I will be doing and I need to remember that my beer goggles are very powerful, they make me ignore all negatives until it is too late. I had fun but the post fun emotional hangover was somethin...

Today is my Dad's 70th birthday and as usual he was very low key about it. He wanted no fuss, no party and no gifts.When I called him today to wish him happy birthday he spent most of the call telling me how he was going to do some work at my sister's house and that he was worried about it. That is my Dad, he is amazing and very selfless. Happy Birthday Dad!

I am listening to a song titled "Even better than the real thing" and I am not understanding it at all. What can ever be better than the real thing? I thought about it some more as I drank a very strong cup of coffee and thought about the amount of fake we allow in our lives. We shouldn't.  This blog post really is a train of thought that has missed its stop or has left the station without a driver. I came back to England 12 weeks ago and feel settled here thought the London daily commute is not good for me and my stress levels, there is nothing quite like an elbow in your rib cage at 730am or being crushed against someone with evil breath for 20 minutes but these are the things we do to earn our living and I am hardly in a position to complain when this is what I wanted to do (be back in London) and I am not some poor kid in Africa who walks miles for a drink of water etc but this is what us comfortable people in the west do, we complain about the tiniest, trivial t...

I may be bad but I'm perfectly good at it!

It could be said that I have had more comebacks than Cher and maybe that is true and maybe I have more comebacks and swansongs left in me yet,who nows, we should never set ourselves limits, they never work, humans, especially me, are always destined to push boundaries, limits, bend rules and test the waters a little. Its in my DNA and it is the way I was raised (thank you to my parents who have taught me never to feel too sorry for myself and have taught me that I am never alone!) So I returned to England 38 days ago and the jury is still out on my decision. I am sad to not be in Barcelona but I am happy not to be in Barcelona at the same time.  Barcelona for me was like having a whirlwind romance with the most handsome man in the world, I fell headfirst, I ignored his flaws, I ignored my own weaknesses and masked over the cracks with a smile and hoped the sunshine and latin/catalan atmosphere would sweep me up. It sure did then often dumped me on the rocks. If I had been 24...

After a very interesting final few days in Barcelona I am finally home. I have spent some time with my parents and some of my other family and despite having a broken computer and no phone I feel so much calmer than I did 48 hours ago. A few things I have learned over the past 14 months: Your family may not always be on your wavelength but they should always be the most important people in your life; The grass is always greener; Friends and money do not mix; When some people offer to help you and you feel unsure, don't accept it, go with your instincts. Some people only help you so they can then punish you over it at a later stage; When some people tell you to grow up, ignore them, growing up is over-rated, how we deal with things is an individual thing. A sense of fun does not mean immaturity; Some things go wrong in life and it isn't always your fault. I am now going to spend the day with one of my sisters, give my mum some computer lessons and visit my uncle who h...

If there were ever anyone who has thoroughly tested the idiom "the grass is always greener" it has to be me. I have jumped over more fences into more gardens in the past 22 years than I care to count. I am not even sure why! It started in 1992 or so when university ended as did the cozy cocoon like life I had with my friends. It ended abruptly on a June morning in 1992 as my Dad woke me from my sleep. I was asleep on the sofa in my tuxedo, hungover. It had been the last night of university, the Summer Ball,  The summer ball with Penny, Kirsteen and Mathew it was fantastic. We all sat in a park and watched the sunrise, the first day of our new, adult, post graduate lives. I remember the drive home, 5 hours of hangover hell, I was so sad. I realized life was never going to be the same and I have spent the past 22 years looking for something like it, a security blanket, an adult life I can feel comfortable with. I've never really found it. One of my students is a ...

July has been a lovely mix of sunshine, thunder storms and visits from friends and though there are no more scheduled visits for July I am sure the lovely summer will continue. I go to the beach quite often, certainly a lot more than I did when I lived in England and almost as often as I did when I lived in Sydney, Barcelona has so many beaches and on Sunday I was persuaded to go to the gay beach, Mar Bella playa, which is a little further away from the centre and a world away from Seaburn beach where I spent many a childhood summer. It is mixed in so many ways, young old, fat, thin, gym toned and deep fat fried, gay and straight. There are areas which seem to be dedicated to these different groups. We sat on the edge of the area populated with the beautiful people, they looked too beautiful and critical for our liking. I was sat between a group of German nudists and a Spanish man who had so many piercings that he looked like a small scrapyard, personally it wasn't a pretty s...

Greetings from Barcelona on the San Juan holiday. Last night was crazy. It is a night of fireworks and bonfires and cakes called Cocas.   Cocas De San Juan Here the idea of health and safety takes a backseat, kids as young as 3 were running around with fireworks in our street, setting off rockets and standing right next to them. I suspect the local A&Es were busy last night and I love fireworks but every time one of those kids let off a firework I cringed, as an uncle and teacher I dreaded what could happen as the parents stood around drinking beer looking on. Maybe I am too British about it, too boring but fireworks are wonderful to watch but even as an adult I would not feel comfortable handling them. The fireworks were going off until 3am at least and from 5 floors up the view was spectacular and from that distance I wouldn't see if any of the kids had their fingers blown off etc though I did hear a few screams and couldn't tell if they were of delight or pai...

Whatever Sicily conjures up in your mind at first should be discarded, tired cliches, Hollywood movies and stereotypes can be thrown away with last nights ragu. I visited Sicily this weekend, 4 days, 3 nights, 3 cities with one of my oldest friends (17 years and counting) Rebecca.  Our selfie on the bus from Palermo to Catania. We only decided to go in March so I had nothing in mind apart from Mount Etna and I didn't read up anything on Sicily apart from the bus and train schedules and the flight details. I knew Rebecca would read the Lonely Planet guide from cover to cover and would be able to quote it at me if necessary and I was right, she did and found most of the good places we ate at. The view over Palermo from our hotel Teatro Massimo One of the many markets in Palermo We flew to Palermo and spent our first night in the city. It is great, old, big, busy, horrible traffic, great food, great buildings, great people. I think everyone there is a...

I wrote this months ago when I was teaching a lovely lady called Rosa. She was born blind and also has autism but was one of my most lively students. I waited until my classes with her ended before publishing this. High on a hill, far above the centre of Barcelona sits Rosa, Rosa sits in eternal darkness yet her life is as full of light as anyone. Rosa loves god and she believes he loves her. Rosa sees things we cannot see. Rosa refuses to walk with a stick or with a guide dog, she relies on her other senses and the kindness of the good people of Barcelona. If only I could do the same. Rosa loves music, she loves the Carpenters and their songs of love and broken hearts, feelings Rosa may never experience. Rosa was my student for 7 months until it was decided for her that she was too stressed to have lessons. I learnt more from Rosa than she did from me. A Saint Jordi Rose for Rosa Rosa still loves a god that allowed her to be born blind and allowed her brother to be blind and...

I teach English to a range of students, children and adults, lawyers and psychologists, engineers and nurses so the vocabulary I teach and the phrases that arise can be varied but sometimes they are bizarre and although I recognize them and use them, sometimes they are hard to explain.  The first one that springs to mind is sheep-worrying it came to mind yesterday when I was reading a story in a newspaper. Here is a list of the weird ones that have been used in the past few weeks in my classes and are hard to explain. Phrases and their definitions: Sheep-worrying :   ( agriculture )  the act (of a dog, sheepdog, wolf, etc) of chasing a flock of sheep and biting or injuring the sheep. Crying over spilt milk:  to lament something that cannot be altered Raining Cats and Dogs:    to rain very heavily It's cold enough to freeze the balls off a brass-monkey:  used to say that the weather is freezing cold Six of one and half a doz...

I had been looking forward to seeing Dallas Buyers Club this movie for months, it was released in Spain on March 14th, 2014, 4 months after the US release date so the coverage and the awards helped build my expectation.  I finally watched it on March 16th here in Spain. So this is my review and comments so if you are yet to see it don't read this, it contains spoilers etc. When I first heard of the movie I had no idea of its contents and the image of  Matthew McConaughey  in modern cowboy clothes didn't bode well. I'm not a fan of  Matthew McConaughey  nor of Jared Leto. Of the 3 leads,  Jennifer Garner was the only one I had some respect for as I've liked a few of her movies, 13 Going on 30 being one of my favourites.  I read an interview with Jared Leto about his role as a pre-op transsexual and how he prepared for it etc and I felt more intrigued. All I can say is, he would be a pretty woman, he is a pretty man so the physical change w...