The Boy and The Coconut Tree

I don't really know the man I am writing to. I have spent no more than 24 hours with him since 1973 when he moved away with his new family and pretended I didn't exist.  When he swept back into my life in 1984 he acted as if he was the 2nd coming of Christ, he expected me to worship him as a long lost hero.  My first impressions of my biological father when I was 14 were not good. He was trying to be cool and he wasn't. He thought this cynical kid was going to be impressed by his guitar and cigars, I wasn't. I was of course curious, who wouldn't be!? I had loads of questions and still do. He acted as if his abandonment of me was normal yet wondered why I had forgotten he existed.  I was 3.5 when he vanished with his new wife. I am told the story how he offered me to my Dad as if I was a possession. Now my mother has never said too many bad things about him. We have talked about his strict upbringing, the bulling by his father, the smothering by his mother and the o...

I will explain the title later.  I have just returned from a visit to Amsterdam to see another part of my family, my brother Andrew, his wife Laura and their little girl, Toni.  I stayed in their home in the hear of the  Jordaan district overlooking the  Brouwersgracht . This wasn't my first trip to Amsterdam but it was the first time I stayed in a family home and it made a difference to experience the city like a local, meeting the locals. I met some interesting people that I would never have met, a particular mention must be the two ladies who work in a coffee store on  Haarlemmerstraat. The two ladies who work in there were funny, not a word of English was spoken but they told me and Andrew we looked nothing alike but we did have the same wrinkles! I bought a lovely Indonesian coffee that was darker than ebony and smells divine. I had to be careful talking about coffee shops as there is a huge difference between a coffee shop and a cafe.   ...

I've tried my hardest to avoid writing about Brexit, partly in the hope it is going to go away or I'll wake up and find out I was having a bad dream about a country that decided to turn its back on its closest friends and sought refuge in the mythical paradise of Trump's USA and communist China. Sadly it is true and the days are counting down and the faux patriotic cliches continue to pour out of the mouths of our politicians and right wing journalists. Industries threat to relocate and reduce investment and the Brexiter response is either 'let them, well cope' or 'they are blackmailing us, they want more money' , no they don't want more money, they want stability and access to the EU markets.  Sure the UK doesn't make as many bits and bobs as it did 50 years ago but those bits and bobs (cars, aeroplane wings, medicines, aero engines) go to the EU in vast quantities and the EU is really good at doing trade deals with other big countries, Japan thi...

This week I sat an exam for the first time since 2004.  The exam itself was as I expected, difficult but not too testing but the experience was interesting, especially the planning of it, the allowing of late students to enter the exam room and the complete lack of buzz you normally feel before and after an exam. One of the better parts of exams at school was the joint experience with your friends before and after, the drinks in the pub after our A levels etc. This was very corporate, no interaction with my fellow students and no support or guidance from the institute. The #ICSA qualification is a good one but ICSA seem to be about money rather than a holistic approach to education and learning.  I didn't enjoy it despite enjoying the subject matter. I will have to think long and hard about continuing with this course at this institute as it doesn't feel like value for money.  My friends laughed at my exam routine, a routine I've had since my O levels. I take in ...

I have just spent the past 6 weeks working for a major UK charity and I truly admire the work it does and I am amazed at its ability to deliver services to people as it undergoes a major change to its structure. I witnessed the complex changes, it is undergoing, first hand. I didn't stay longer than 6 weeks as my role was one of the things chopped and changed during the restructure and luckily I had another contract to go to.  What did shock me about the charity was the way some of the senior people spoke to their juniors.  During a very senior level meeting one of the trustees referred to me a a 'Nazi' and 'Dr Mengele' and this was the first time he had met me and was part of his 'getting to know me banter' .. I was shocked and if we had been alone I would have let rip on him but as he is also the Lord Lieutenant of London I thought it best to stay quiet and simply make some sarcastic comments about him forgetting to close car doors for the royals (it is ...

What a long summer this has been, a hot summer and a long one too!  My summer started on May 25th when my contract at CIMA ended and will come to an end this Monday (September 3rd when I start my new job).  The summer started well, a fantastic trip to Australia and nice side trip to Abu Dhabi, despite the long flights and the jet lag I had a fantastic time seeing friends and doing touristy things I didn't do the first time I visited Australia.  Abu Dhabi was a beach holiday and as anyone who knows me is well aware, I cannot sit still for very long, I get bored easily and I am not a fan of novels designed for people who only read at the beach.  I tanned and swam but after 2 hours and the 45c heat, I was done and ready for my next adventure. This stretch of under-employment/unemployment is the longest ever, 12 weeks of living on Job Seekers Allowance and the bi-weekly visit to the dole office to prove I was actively seeking work etc. Oh I was actively seeking w...

The UK is now on the 6th week of a heatwave that has only weakened once with thunderstorms, flooding and train chaos. Yes the British summer continues to be as everyone expects it to be, changeable and unpredictable. It reached 34c somewhere near London in the last week of July and it reached 29c inside my apartment, another record. I've made it to the beach a few times this summer, certainly more than last year and I stupidly booked my summer holiday in Australia where they were having their winter and now all the flights to places I could visit (and be hosted by friends) are crazy high.  £300 return to Barcelona from London is silly. I flew to Australia for £702 on a far better airline than Easyjet. But I guess Barcelona is the place people want to fly to in July and August much to the chagrin of the locals who are increasingly unhappy with the crowds of tourists who are swamping the city and making some neighbourhoods unlivable for locals. My friends in Spain are telling me how...