My England, your England, our England.

As politicians on the right make profit from the terrorism in Manchester last week (but do deals with the spreaders of hate in Saudi Arabia) I wanted to say why they don't speak for me, a British man, not a flag waving patriot but someone who likes what this country is despite its flaws (flaws which have nothing to do with migrants or religions), flaws that politicians could fix if they were not simply interested in feathering their own nests and profiting from the suffering of others.

Last night I was drinking with one of my friends who was born in Spain, raised in the UK, for me that is a typical weekend. He is straight, the rest of us were gay, again a normal night out in London.  Next week I will be having dinner with my American friend married to an Indian man, his best friend and his sister, again, a normal event in modern Britain. This morning I was served coffee by Simona from Italy and later today I had my eyes tested by Sanya, a British Muslim and was served in Waitrose by Lukas, born overseas but happy to make England his home.  Now recent events in Manchester and before that in London have made some people question the presence of all these non British people around us, but for me, they are all British, born here, or wanted to live here so badly they crossed the world.  The actions of an angry young man cannot be used to label a whole section of society, can it!? If it can then let me say this, I was bullied terribly as a teenager, by white Anglo-Saxons, boys and some teachers and the occasional girl, why? Because they thought I was different, to them, too different for their comfort; of course I was different, I was clever talkative and bad at sport, I wasn't the typical boy in the north-east, I didn't fit the stereotype, so I was bullied, spat on, abused in the changing rooms at school and called puff or faggot by the teacher and this happened a great deal from the age of 12 until I was 16. Now these people were a minority but not a small enough minority for my liking but these people are supposed to be my people, English, proud, many of them think they are the best people on earth but the fact they would abuse someone simply for not being good at football makes me question their humanity. I hope they grew up into better adults but I know some of them didn't.  Now the actions of a man whose parents came from Libya, parents who fought for freedom, are being used by some to label every Muslim in the UK.  Libyan Muslims are as similar to Iraqi Muslims as I am to a Jewish guy in Jerusalem yet our media and politicians clump them all together. This is wrong.  Just as I don't think all white English men are homophobic bullies I don't think Muslim men are terrorists and I don't think all Americans are loud greedy idiots (Trump).  I work with two Muslim men, they are not at all similar when it comes to the practice of their religion, one does Ramadan light (because it falls in the summer and is unhealthy) where the other, a doting father of 2 kids, does follow Ramadan more strictly and he loves Liverpool FC and goes to as many games as he can despite living in London.   All of us are British and the three of us love Manchester and have connection to it.  

The Brexit vote last year has opened up a great sore in this country that makes me feel queasy. As a person who has lived outside of Britain for a total of 5 years in my life, I know our reputation good and bad and I always missed my country, I disliked some of its flaws but the things that I loved made me miss it and the arrival of people from our former empire and the EU have not changed these things. We are still passive aggressive to each other on public transport but at the same time terrible nosey about other people's business. We have 'stiff upper lip' yet are incredibly emotional about our pets and football teams.  And young men across the country, be they christian, Buddhist, Muslim or Jewish, still like going home to eat their mum's home cooked meals (as I still do).  Simple things get lost after a violent tragedy but by next week teenage girls and boys across the country (of all faiths and races) will be going to concerts, thousands will go to sporting events and if we ignore the political hate filled rhetoric, we will continue being British.  The right wing only wins if we hate each other and fear each other.  Fear and hate are not British qualities. Brexit is coming now, it feels like a train with no breaks and the drivers are fighting about what is best for those of us in the passenger carriages and many of us are pressing the stop button but are not being heard.  Brexit was started by racists who sought to divide us and make the EU the enemy but they won't stop their, don't let them! I will be watching my friends and colleagues closely over the next few months and listen to what they say, hate won't be tolerated, I am too old to put up with crap from bitter, hateful people now even if they have known me most of my life.

This is for the bullies, and it is damn true!

And now I am going to head home and prepare for my party which will be attended by an Italian, a New Zealander, a Canadian, a Spaniard and a dog. We will drink Italian and Spanish wine, German beer and snacks from all over the world and enjoy a very British bank holiday,  by being rained on. 

And this is my current TV obsession: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9SeD8g8QrE

Everyone should try lemonading!

Don't look back in anger!